Big Bro in Da House

Yesterday was my birthday party, an event that managed to rock out for almost 24 entire hours, with the last guest leaving at about 11.30 this morning. I wasn't even too inebriated, which makes a serious change!

I'm not sure I believe in the concept of 'best' anything, but for linguistic convenience, one of my very best presents came this year from my brother, who made a DVD filled with delights for me.

As he left the party in the early hours of this morning he gave me instructions.

"Tomorrow morning, when you wake up, feeling like shit and crazy - watch that film. I mean it, before you do anything else. Watch the film."

This morning I wake up, feeling like shit and crazy, and I go looking for the disc. I look for it for half an hour, becoming increasingly frantic and desperate, until I find it, looking innocent, in the corner of the living room. While Lou and Kit Kat put my flat back to rights around me, I sit perfectly still, watching the DVD my brother made for me. I cry and laugh and am surprised and joyful.

It is the first time in a long time that I have been swept with such an overwhelming appreciation for my relationship with my brother, something about birthdays maybe, that makes me appreciate the daily wonder of what I have. I chide myself again for thinking - often hard enough to bruise heart and mind - of what I do not have, over all the things I do.

So, this clip is for my brother, who brings out the wonder, the stardust and the very best in me. This is how your film made me feel today, my big brother - thank you so much. I'm so lucky. I love you x